Urge to update my blog
It has been 14 days that I did not update my blog. Perhaps the stress from work, study, girlfriend, financial, family and my personal lifestyle have blown me out. 4 days to go, my final exam of Thermodynamics, another subject that is killing me!! I rather prefer non mechanical/ electronic subject, such as management and IT subjects. This is the path that I've chosen since I graduated from Secondary 5 in Malaysia. I've to continue my venture... my venture into this field.. which I started to realise that I don't really like since I was in end of 2nd year in Singapore Polytechnic.
Tonight, perhaps tuesday morning??? , I feel like want to shout out loudly to the sky above... I want to shout, I want to release all my sorrow, unhappiness out from my heart.. Yes, they are in my heart.. not in my uncle-like stomache... I feel that my heart is locked..... locked with a missing key.. Where is the key to open my heart and make me enlighten of everything & feel happy, energetic to my future, getting excellent performance regardless work, study or my own life? I've lost my confidence feeling.. a strong feeling that I had it from Primary 6 to Secondary 3.. and not to forget about the times that the Sec. Sch Vice Principal's projects to me.. which I believe I handled them well & organised (at least he praised me even when we met after I graduated.)
During the childish, stubborn and wishful mindset's secondary sch's Golden Time, I had a lot of memories.... I admit that I am aggressive (even until now). However, I really try my best to complete a task (even if u can't feel that I try my best). I am trying my best, I assure u.. I swear, I sumpah, I pledge, I ....everything.. Where is the confidence of mine that attracted my gf during my secondary school times?? Why?? Why would my confidence lost without leaving any track to me..
My exam is coming.. I believe this will be another lousy outcome.. (Oh my god, no confidence again? pessimistic?) I don't know.. My friend, KW, was asking me to be more brightful, optimistic, try to be happy and so on.. Thank you, KW. and I know that I had put u in very difficult situation ever since I went to work under you. I really didnt want it to happen but it is just inevitable... (excuses? No....) KW told me I have potential to contribute effectively to the company.. However, so far I didnt see that I can contribute much in the technical, perhaps in documentation & office work which I think i can do it fast and neat..
I need to get back my confidence. I need to get my own life back to track.. I've lost so many years ever since I chose to further my study in Singapore.. Yet, my achievement is nothing much compared to my life during secondary school.. I am sorry everyone.. I know I've let u down..
The song playing is "A Meaningful Love Song released in Year 2000, which express my feeling when I was coming to Singapore......"
I believe many of you have some memories in mind while listening to this song.. want to have lyrics? just request it and I will do it for u..
Tonight, perhaps tuesday morning??? , I feel like want to shout out loudly to the sky above... I want to shout, I want to release all my sorrow, unhappiness out from my heart.. Yes, they are in my heart.. not in my uncle-like stomache... I feel that my heart is locked..... locked with a missing key.. Where is the key to open my heart and make me enlighten of everything & feel happy, energetic to my future, getting excellent performance regardless work, study or my own life? I've lost my confidence feeling.. a strong feeling that I had it from Primary 6 to Secondary 3.. and not to forget about the times that the Sec. Sch Vice Principal's projects to me.. which I believe I handled them well & organised (at least he praised me even when we met after I graduated.)
During the childish, stubborn and wishful mindset's secondary sch's Golden Time, I had a lot of memories.... I admit that I am aggressive (even until now). However, I really try my best to complete a task (even if u can't feel that I try my best). I am trying my best, I assure u.. I swear, I sumpah, I pledge, I ....everything.. Where is the confidence of mine that attracted my gf during my secondary school times?? Why?? Why would my confidence lost without leaving any track to me..
My exam is coming.. I believe this will be another lousy outcome.. (Oh my god, no confidence again? pessimistic?) I don't know.. My friend, KW, was asking me to be more brightful, optimistic, try to be happy and so on.. Thank you, KW. and I know that I had put u in very difficult situation ever since I went to work under you. I really didnt want it to happen but it is just inevitable... (excuses? No....) KW told me I have potential to contribute effectively to the company.. However, so far I didnt see that I can contribute much in the technical, perhaps in documentation & office work which I think i can do it fast and neat..
I need to get back my confidence. I need to get my own life back to track.. I've lost so many years ever since I chose to further my study in Singapore.. Yet, my achievement is nothing much compared to my life during secondary school.. I am sorry everyone.. I know I've let u down..
The song playing is "A Meaningful Love Song released in Year 2000, which express my feeling when I was coming to Singapore......"
I believe many of you have some memories in mind while listening to this song.. want to have lyrics? just request it and I will do it for u..
posted by -KSY™®- at
11/14/2006 12:29:00 AM
5 Comments:
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